Almost four years ago, in August of 2009, we bought a brand new, surprisingly powerful, electric hedge trimmer. The hubby was delighted. On a bright, sunny Saturday afternoon, I left him to his own devices and went off to do the weekly grocery shopping. As I pulled around the front of the house, he was attacking our unruly boxwoods along the front. His new hedge trimmer was buzzing merrily and was slicing through our (admittidly out-of-control) shrubbery like butter. I heard a little voice in the back of my mind, "Mayyyyyybe leaving him alone with a power tool is a bad idea." But I drove on anyway...because truth be told, I have always hated those boxwoods and thought, "Let him do his worst."
When I returned home a few hours later, I could see this:
This is the side of the house, not the front. I didn't know he had intended to trim things on the side of the house! There aren't any ugly boxwoods on the side of the house! I moved closer:
and started chanting, "No. Nonononononono..." and moved closer still....
"Wha???? But, but, but...that's my camellia bush!"
"Jeff!!!" I said (or maybe shrieked is a better word) "What have you done to my beautiful camellia bush???" I turned slightly and looked at the carnage:
"Did you say something?" he asked.
"You killed my camellia bush."
"Naw...it'll be fine."
"Jeff, LOOK AT IT!!! It's NAKED...and what's with the one weird thingie you've left sticking out of the top?"
"Oh, that? I thought I should leave it with some green for when it grows back."
"It's not growing back! You've murdered it! MURDERED! You're nothing but a big ole BUSH MURDERER!!! God, I hope you can sleep at night."
Then I stomped away, all pissed off.
I kept waiting on that little weird bunch of green leaves at the top of the one branch he had left unmolested to start to wilt and drop. Then I could be all "A-HA!!! I TOLD YOU, I TOLD YOU, I TOLD YOU! CAMELLIA KILLER!!" but that never happened. Now mind you, the next spring, that bush was still pretty butt-ugly, but it wasn't dead. The following spring, it wasn't quite as hideous and had even more growth to it. Here is what it looks like today:
Yeah, it's fine. It actually produced some really nice blossoms this past winter, as it's a winter-blooming bush.
So honey, I'm sorry I called you a Bush Killer (and other things) back in 2009. You were right and I was wrong. I even think it could use a LITTLE trimming back...just not quite as much as last time, please.